Admittedly a man leaves himself wide open the moment he speaks. Or writes. Or does. He has made statement as to who he is, and of his estate. Everything has motive. Everything originates from a some place.
This should not be hard recognize as true; even if we also admit the discerning of such motives as a given of themselves are not as easily identified to particulars. Some seem obvious; but as with all seems, getting to the very root of a matter is rarely in all semblance to what we see or hear “above ground”. Before we can begin to appreciate this as true, particularly of ourselves, we must be brought to some agreement in knowing how much springs from the dark; beneath the surface so easily seen.
Again, we need not know all particulars, but unless or until we have had something of these two verses “worked” into us as applying personally to us (and not for the mere “handling of others”) we may be very much at a loss:
The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?
Along with Jesus’ restatement:
For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications, murders, Thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lasciviousness, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness: All these evil things come from within, and defile the man.
O! but this leaves us in a dire place. Who can navigate here? This place from which thoughts and attitudes become words and deeds? Who dare make one move with this knowing? And worse…without it…how much has been done? And where is the man who can trust his own heart to tell him he is not defiling himself?
Who “knows himself” beyond what the Lord has said? Or better (or worse?) where is the man who has not seen something of these matters in his very own self? To say the Lord cuts us off from all hope in, or of ourselves by this knowing of us is not too drastic a word. Is it? What isn’t included there that all men, or any man might think he has escaped that eye? Who isn’t…even if at the very least, not caught by deceit? Who will say “I have never lied”? O! but that man might be the easiest to assess! Or, “I am honest” or an honest man…do we see how laughably plain we are put, (and put ourselves) on display?
We can go beyond evangelical considerations, but we can also stop for a moment to consider how very clear in its severity of pronouncement this is. How can a man be preached of such knowing of us to any benefit to us? Not only so, but who could preach such a man? And again, not only so, how can any hope be found for a man who (by a man) so plainly utters not only the hoplelessness of man in his estate as what proceeds from his own heart (nature) but that is all plainly seen to a defiling?
A persuasion must come (even though the man experiences it in himself) from someplace other than his own heart. Simply, the heart cannot bear such truth about itself…that ultimately it knows nothing of the truth…about itself. All is assumption, all leads to presumption, and the man who even believes he (of himself) is able to recognize such truth about himself and therefore would fashion for himself the image of a man who “prefers harsh truth over comfortable lies” is no less, lying to himself…again. And more. Oh, what a strange place of entry! Idols now appear almost everywhere! One might even ask…”must there be so much despair…and despairing of all else?” And now we begin to recognize Paul’s cry “O wretched man that I am, who will save me from this body of death?” This temple erected in all to serve an idol…our very own self.
But Paul knew. Do we? How the work of such despairing of our very own selves…is not our own work. We could not even recognize the righteousness of such fullness of despairing were it not for the persuasion of another. Someone able to “take us out of ourselves” but also maintain for us, by His power and entry alone, some recognition of self, some continuing identity of self as Paul sought to convey in:
“I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live, yet not I, but Christ lives in me…”
To speak of becoming dull of hearing by the oft repetition of this verse is hardly necessary. But, be that as it may, if one does not find some mystery of the man who states he lives while dead in crucifixion (nevertheless I live) but then goes on to say, and speak of the “yet not I”…well…if one does not sense a need for light of revelation here…
How does a man know himself as…yet not I?
And if you think one is merely trying to “torture a verse” to some end of mere philosophical musings…well have at it your self. But who will be tackling it, you…or the “yet not I”? Could you know? And if so, could you convince another? Better yet…are you convinced…of Paul? Can you…or do you believe Paul knew this, and of this, in himself?
As said, a man leaves himself wide open the moment he makes any statement. We have Paul’s statement. And now this is added to, or expanded upon, in question(s). You may not find my questions fair, or merely a rabbit trail on which I hope to slyly take you. If my speaking/writing signals a “too late” for me by making them known; you at least are still in the place of discerning that must precede their judgment. We are both now quite a bit “on the hook” for this, me for speaking…you for hearing/reading. And I find no place (nor will to desire so) that we be “let off” it, this captivity. Do you believe the spiritual man judges all things? What then is exempted from all things?
Are there any other places we might find light regarding of how a man knows himself…or better…is known? Did Jesus say anything about it? Are there any other places we might find where Paul gives testimony of such an operating? What would appear as an almost (if not concretely) made reference to a man being “occupied” so to speak? Where a man is broken down in, and from, what he formerly believed the integrity of himself as a unity, as of a “one” person in occupation (even of himself), but now discerned as being in parts?
Might it even be that a man cannot begin to proceed in revelation to a unity promised, prayed for, entreated of the Father on our behalf…unless and until he even recognizes his own fragmentation? The how he “behaves” within himself being revealed? Is our repair (and re-pairing) less than this profound?
Can you consider these things said by Jesus as His knowing of how man occupies himself?
And he spake a parable unto them, saying, The ground of a certain rich man brought forth plentifully: And he thought within himself, saying, What shall I do, because I have no room where to bestow my fruits? And he said, This will I do: I will pull down my barns, and build greater; and there will I bestow all my fruits and my goods. And I will say to my soul, Soul, thou hast much goods laid up for many years; take thine ease, eat, drink, and be merry. But God said unto him, Thou fool, this night thy soul shall be required of thee: then whose shall those things be, which thou hast provided?
“And I will say to my soul…”
Obviously there’s a conversation taking place within this man. A one thing speaking to another thing…even his own soul. This would be enough, but let’s take it farther. Whatever “it” is (that “I”) speaking to that soul is clearly displayed as wrong. One would even say liar. There are not many years (as that “I” assures) to do or be anything…in fact it appears plain its rebuke will be both sudden and irreversible…even to some shock: “thou fool”. Do you (and I do not exempt myself) ever tell yourself…how things “will be”? Have you ever discovered yourself…wrong?Even quite wrong? All wrong?
Have you ever been married? Is that an unfair question? O! but don’t get this wrong…there’s great hope and help for the self that finds itself (has had revealed to itself) it is wrong! And even greater hope and help to be revealed when this is accepted as not in part. Not merely “mistakes” made, mere errors of judgment…as if it “might have done better”. That’s just pride still seeking its place while trying to hide behind some admission of error. As though a man “could know better”. This is still a man trying to save himself in some perverse thinking that the thing that didn’t know better…could have. It’s a man striving to occupy two places at once, thinking he can. Saying “the thing that didn’t know better could have known better if only I had…”
Done what? What can the “I” do in estate of not knowing better…to know better? Anything?
Our own expectations of circumstances and situations are always being dealt with. No less are any and all expectations of how we would react, or how we would “be” in any situation is also being exposed. We often hold many illusions about ourselves. God knows we needn’t go to Peter for this, yet we can if need be. But that will be of very little help if one only sees Peter in this. If we think such things only pertain to Peter.
All of God’s response to man is through the man Jesus the Christ and there is no “work around” nor go around. And His abiding presence and work which causes us to follow (again, if need be, ask Peter what can be shown of man’s ability to follow) will disclose many things to us, once hidden. Oh yes, we can be foolish and blame the situation as cause; having not yet come to the place as understanding all things are for the purpose of disclosure of things hidden.
We can think we are, or would be normally this or thus and so…but for an aberration into extreme circumstance. Yes, we can be foolish. But we are appointed to a very particular following after…even to the following of that man who came into the earth knowing it was to an end of very specific purpose never far from His knowing. We must hear Him. Hear Him without apology nor excuse nor reviling for a circumstance to which He was led.
“What shall I say then, Father deliver me from this hour? But it is for this very hour I have come, glorify your name”
Things will only sneak up on us, catch us unawares and provoke surprise or shock in our reaction only to the extent we both harbor illusions about ourselves and whatever remains of our unseeing of the Lord as He is. These two matters go hand in hand so to speak. And until they are resolved in and to us, things will remain to us very exterior in their working; not appreciating the hands of Him to which we are delivered into by Christ as now our Father (no less than Christ’s) nor the necessity of Him in presence, nor the extremity of this must:
There is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved.
And that “we” is no more nor less mine than it is more or less, yours. We must be saved.
And disclosure of our own estate goes a long way in the convincing of this. But no man can go there…into the revelation of all his own weakness and inability; even perversity made plain to his sight, unless he be led. And no man can bear it (its revelation), likewise, unless he be comforted by an assurance not his own.
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