That New Commandment

I simply don’t know any other way around it.

On our way to learning the depths of this commandment, this new commandment “Love one another as I have loved you” the working is at once far more profound, but also far more strange than could have ever been imagined.

If I were to say that in all I once held a certain perception of such as that which following Jesus would yield, even per an agenda perhaps; but am now finding it far different than once perceptions and conceptions, would you understand? Things are so very very different in substance than they once appeared.

Love one another as I have loved you. That new commandment.

It never goes away, never gets dimmer, only brighter, never comes to some fulfillment as I might have once apprehended fulfillment to mean. Yes, the word of the Lord, even these words of the Lord, have no dimming in them, no finality that any man (as I am persuaded) might say “OK, that part is done…what is next?”. There is always a deeper.

Now even as I write I sense some irksomeness, perhaps even a resistance to such seeming lack of finality. Almost as though it is a promise of constant frustration…to be told something, to be under instruction or pursue something that appears as it does, with ‘no end’.

Yet, even at my own resistance there is no dismay, for how could it ever be less than that? Who would have, or hold the Lord’s love as some finite thing: as when a project is finished and now is time to ‘move on to another’? Who has ever (I speak to men in Christ) so tasted of the Lord’s love (even specifically toward themselves) and ever thought “Well, that’s enough of that, time to move on to something else”?

What else takes your breath away…to not only know of His presence, but to know of it as the very manifestation of His love for one? Not there to condemn (though I dare not deny many rebukes), not there to pain (though I dare not deny the many chastenings) not there but for any other than His purpose to simply ‘be with’ the one and ones to whom He has promised “I will never leave you nor forsake you”. He, in all fulfillment of Himself as inseparably congruent and consistent with His word.

And this all done without any show of grimace, any form of distaste as though odious to Him to be ‘that one’ and do so, even to have been made so, as the one capable of full fellowship with man, and as a man. This is very high for me. Yet, it is who He is. To even come as one to sit in dust with any fallen who have known the disgrace of having their own mouths stopped with dust in their fall and without strength to even call for help, nor certainly utter one ‘good thing’. Utterly patient to be seen.

No, and Yes! it is different. Far different than once I surely thought, even believed was end. And here I make no claim of any attaining, only some glimpse of things far too wonderful than imagination might have conjured. Even if or with ‘best intent’. (Of which I can never claim, for it is far too late for me to deny the truth of how woefully short even what I may think are my best intents fall and fail) and how very untrustworthy they are always shown. His intent(s) always rise, my own are not merely negligible, but in all, for the ignoring. His intent. His intents. Again, so very high of me and for me to phrase. Yet, He is whom He is.

Yes, I thought or once imagined (and now I speak as a fool) that in such following there would be some eventual survey of my estate not only allowed but to that very end. That I might come to a place where I could perceive myself of some accomplishment, some attaining, and look upon myself with some satisfaction, even approval. I would ‘finally’ be ‘enough as my Lord’ to know myself as such, to delight in myself as such, to even relish at having been made so. See? I told you I must speak as a fool.

How could I have known, a thing so ‘coming out of’ all self interest? Ignorance is a wonderful plea to be given for any in His court to be allowed to declare. As is ‘not guilty’ by reason of insanity. But such must be supplied by the court as plea. I can only testify, it is. And His provision, no matter our estate, even when most foolish and thinking we see so well (I was sure being like Jesus would eventually make me think myself ‘cool’) not knowing how very appropriate is the changing of just one letter in that. A fool…but loved.

Love one another as I have loved you. It never ends. It cannot because He does not. The unveiling of what has no end (and we may come to glimpse) has a beginning far further before than our own imaginations might carry us, is well, yes, breathtaking. Again, it could be no less than He Himself could be less than He is. Everlasting love does not, and did not start at our own recognition of it, though we so peculiarly may still mark times and seasons. We are too well known well before we even know ourselves as ourselves. Even right now, in all we ‘may think’ we know of ourselves. Or Him.

Yes, it is strange how this commandment…stays. Strange as in too marvelous. Even all failings and falling shorts as when some harshness is revealed to me of attitude, disposition, impatience or irksomeness…serve its end. Have I been loved so? Out of some painful obligation? Out of some odious service? God forbid, He has never shown Himself anything but kind and forbearing in His patience toward a one whom, when coming to any or some sobriety, cannot but declare ‘justice was merited there and no less than death for such hypocrisy and deceit’…yet…’you have loved me past it.’ And not only so…but through it.

Dare I show less? God forbid! And yet I cannot deny of the many times I have…and still, finding the wonder of His love, sustaining. Dare I, in any way, be found implying even an iota of taking such for granted? Again, God forbid!

But too oddly it is, isn’t it? Such is ‘granted’. He has granted Himself in eternal love to us and for us, that even we might be delivered from such attitude that lends to a taking for granted. And so that, even if, or when we do, and are found indulging such attitude, He does not deny Himself. I better understand a little why Paul exclaimed in such as could only be dismay if left without the spirit’s full help “Who is equal to such a task?” Who could ever rightly ‘relate’ in word and words, or even higher, demonstration were it not for an intercessor ever attentive to our estate and frames and giving the spirit in His name to help with all our infirmities?

Yes. He has sent us, or better, granted us, given us, a too wonderful treasure hunt formed of all indelibleness mapped in us, by His presence…seek out how much you are loved, that vet particular ‘as I have loved you’, and you will find yourself unable to deny it your brother.

And that is too wonderful to a man who once thought he knew what love is enough to say…”OK, but what is next, what is in it for me after that?” with some (now too plainly seen) remarkably insane straight facedness, to himself.

If any have been brought in merest sense to know the innate hostility of what may be found in man to all that is eternal and true, and been made able to smell the acrid plumes that rise from such resistance, in such awful resistance, he may come to appreciate a great wonder.

That One has been given authority, and of such magnitude in all, that he has power to turn such a staunchly and dreadly committed adversary to a friend…and even One to whom He might show what love truly is. Yes, I once sought after beholding myself as ‘good’ friend, and made much of seeking to display myself as such. It is enough to be called friend, and to see hope presented for one who now holds some hope that he too, is being made able…to love.

This is too great a wonder, particularly for a man like me. The promise of being able to love, and given in too wonderful a way of finding…to see, search out, discover, just how very much I have been loved. I am not sorry at all for matters beyond my ability to plumb to all ‘end’. And if God grant that there be another time I smack my thumb firmly with a hammer of such force to even forget in such pang the One who already saw that coming, He understands my forgetfulness provoked in frame’s weakness.

“Love one another”…but not left there…”as I have loved you”

I testify there is no greater finding than the love that is in Christ. It is to see Christ, Himself.

It obliterates any tendency toward boredom…and taking for granted…that which has been granted us to know.