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There’s an immutable working to all God is doing, has done, and will do; at least as far as we are concerned in such matters in our perceived restrictions to time. If this seems too bold to say, one need only consider the boldness with which our brother Peter spoke; as mentioned for consideration in last section. It is not only bold, and spoken in such boldness, but also, and no less, quite apparently paradoxical to the extreme. Of such paradox that it is understood by a mere observer, or a mere listener as opposed to hearer, as borderline crazy. That is where (in the natural man) appearances and seems, reign. To the natural mind (even in some concept of God or a god) to say a man can be lawless (or have lawless hands) when participating in the outworking of God’s will and perfectly planned purpose (for who can resist it?)…well, how can it but not sound, at very least a bit, “off the wall?”

Is any saying that “God can deliver a man out from time” even to such end that he may be made to see (even if only vaguely) such restrictions are only perceived restriction? That in and of itself seems quite a bit to apprehend, yet if we flip it so to speak, do we not already presume it so? And what if, in some most fundamental way one were to say, especially to or of believers that for them God is always about delivering out from presumption to knowledge and understanding…would that be too lofty?

As a beater of dead horses, even those of my own presentation, dare I be ashamed? Listen if you can or will. Who of us in this mix of what appears believer and unbeliever, does not already have some persuasion we can and do escape time…by looking back (so to speak) and believe we see how “things really were” (past time) or even formulating notions of how things will and must be (future time)?

You do not hammer without a full expectation that by some laws of mass and momentum force will be transferred to the nail head, thence down to point of nail to drive it into substance? We don’t call this a continual experiment, do we? Or that how, if setting a can of beans on the counter they will remain exactly where they are put. And even if to whatever measure their placement is forgotten and we look for them, we never assume (for we always presume otherwise of things we do) they could be on the garage shelf with our tools. We think we know what we do and did, (and likewise of others) and even what we will do and must happen according to some projections (and likewise of and for others).

And yes, some things we may call “iffy” in these projections to the back (past) and forth (future) “Can I make this thousand mile trip on that bald tire?” And if a vision coming to us of a 70 mph blowout on a crowded 4 lane overwhelms all other factors of our calculating in the now, we adjust for a future. Even for the preservation in many cases of our future (and having one) that either does not include a vision of neck braces and legs with external fixators, or even a vision of ourselves (ha ha, how do we do that?) in a casket.

Do you think these matters…too crazy? Too fundamentally known and understood to not be worthy of bearing mention? Enough to say “Of course that’s how man and men …work”! They calculate from past (of acquired knowledge, past experiences, some informing) and then project to a future with some expectation of it. But, I am not ashamed to beat a dead horse. And, as far as the natural man (may I use that term?) is concerned, and could say, I (with my own bag of knowledge, experiences, and whatever informing) ha ha! I too would presume such to be said…even (with some understanding) that to him it is said legitimately, that I am fool! I cannot but appear so! Yes, there are immutable workings.

But believers? Oh, there’s a quite different kettle, isn’t there? Is it too far fetched to say that by spirit we are informed to a difference? Where the natural man is bound to one view of all matters, we hold…more? What is the resurrection if not that place where all prior understandings about the finality of death…(and no less, what matters there be of life) are completely overturned? Even the disciples (who were told otherwise by Jesus Himself, that He would return) were in disbelief for joy when He appeared with them and to them. They, as many others, thought Him …”all gone”.

Yikes! Things are not at all as they seem, or even did seem. Suddenly a difference is thrust in our/theirs…”a” face, and in the now, that what happened (past) and the calculated presumptions then into a present significance and consequence (bar those doors, the Jews may still be looking for heads to roll)…are suddenly shown as a folly and completely wrong interpretation of events!

And though this surely framed to that particular matter of death (we come to understand there’s no better place chosen of God for start of Christ to overthrow) so it also extends to such as presumption, to inform or radiate with true light. How that all of a thing once only informed of, and by death, a natural man…fighting tooth and nail against an inevitability, suddenly makes way for the (or “a”) man who sees…the difference. Jesus the Christ of God. Jesus always knew (and knows) what and how the natural man thinks. He, being the spiritual man, knows all about the natural.

Even John the Baptist was made privy to such in his calling, being a preeminent prophet:

And think not to say within yourselves, We have Abraham to our father: for I say unto you, that God is able of these stones to raise up children unto Abraham.

Take a look and see how many translations use the word…presume.

Oh, where they could and would naturally go to assume/presume their standing! Even, and no less, where I have gone. Yes, I see some difference to what I once mistook as real and valid…in the light of something (or someone?) other.

O! yes, how much we (I, especially) may think we have, or know, knew, learned,or even think we remember or have interpreted correctly! And how this all goes into our projections! “Have we not prophesied and done many mighty miracles in your name?” “Hey…doesn’t all that stuff add up to a better outcome than the one you are (presently) telling us is our lot?”

But who will have a word to utter once the Lord says…”depart from me”?

Even relating that way of putting could be my insertion of some presumption! I should tremble to consider what words could come (if any) in consequence to the Lord saying “depart from me, I never knew you”.

God help me.

Admittedly there are areas in the last section addressed, things with undercurrents, things moving as though only in shadow that require clarity, or necessity of being brought to the surface.

God help me, in how deep these matters run. For here we are not without some caution of danger in any thinking such are easily disclosed. Yes, once a matter is made clear it becomes simple to us. As even the most complex operation of a piece of equipment or machinery, if shown to its most minute workings, bit by bit, piece by piece can be understood. Even the most complex equation “works” only by the the operations of the simplest of laws of mathematics, addition and subtraction. (For multiplication and division and all else that would follow are but expansions of these basics. And to the extreme one might even say there’s only one operation…for subtraction is only negative addition.)

If I were to say Jesus descended into the heart of such workings (even allowing that machine to chew Him up, so to speak) might it be understood better? We would, in that case, or better, in this particular case, be speaking of the sufferings of Christ in such descent into such, that He even bring light to deep places to make them known and clear. Yes, once made clear (even the aforementioned proposition) it becomes simply seen, but God forbid we mistake any simplicity, or even simple, for easy.

For us, and to us, God has made all simple…a thing is either of life, or of death.All that might be seen as consequent workings (like mulitplication and division appear as different operations, or more advanced in mathematics, but are themselves only of same operating. What is multiplication but many additions? What is division but “how many times can a certain number be subtracted from this other certain one, with any remaining?”) and seeking to figure back to a single foundation. Yes, we can add symbols and sigmas and deltas, and note of exponents, parentheses and brackets, but ultimately all can be broken down to the only simple operations we have, additions and subtractions. Even so, all begins and ends in, or with our alpha and omega, Jesus the Christ.

A thing then of God is made simple to us, of being either of life, or of death. From these the more advanced seeming calculations of “good and evil”, right and wrong, good or bad; all must return for their standing. Yes, for us especially of all (if as believers we see) all always come down to Jesus as of life, all other things and matters, are of death. But lest one appear fey or coy pretending that simple and easy are always in equal exchange (even though all advanced mathematics rely ultimately upon addition and subtraction) things become less than easy in application, for “of life” is of God…yet, (and God forbid this be misunderstood) He also holds all key(s) and power of death. Jesus Himself declaring “I hold the keys of hell and death”.

O! but this now appears neither simple, nor easy!

I cannot pretend to not be as much in over my head than any other here. But nevertheless, here we are! Made by the faith of Christ in God (who is Himself of God) to bring us to and into reconciliation to that God (that we might even call Him, and know Him, as Father…even as Jesus the Christ himself knew and knows Him) to such end as knowing Him as our life. But we dare not settle to any place not ascribed as of Him, of places and things that are of all quite deep as revealed by the Spirit. “I kill and I make alive, I wound and I heal.” Even to such matter spoken of of God’s power to send strong delusion. And that he can, and will, and does! O! yes, God help me, (and all and any like me, here!) for here all calculations must break down.

The truth is, yes, simple as spoken “…All authority in heaven and earth are given to me…” but who of us dares now confuse simple, with easy? Or easily understood? Yes, we need the One who holds all and any key(s); to anything, of anything, and for anything and everything, to be understood. Yes, here my necessity is no less nor more than yours, yours no less nor more than mine, and even that admission (if we can make it) points to our common (as in shared) life. Even as Jesus recommended to our knowing, and promised to our knowing and understanding…a sharing in Him, that is of Him. Christ, our life. And for this, even our knowing, is the Holy Spirit given. And I believe I too, have the spirit of God.

Yes, undercurrents and mysteries only made clear by the Spirit given, and to those that are of Him. May we never deny the depths, no matter how much we may think has been “made clear to us”. It is not without reason an apostle wrote “And without controversy great is the mystery of godliness: …”

“Without controversy…” unless, of course, one wants to, needs to, or is pressed so to a must to to contradict, and find out what awaits there. We hold no dominion over any man’s faith. Yet all and any we might have, if having anything, have come through the work of another, and we are told to hold to that to which we have attained in any receiving of it.

Therefore our brother Peter, in his having received, was given to even speak (on such a day He was marvelously overcome by the Spirit) a deep deep mystery. Before a mystery can even be explored, or looked into, it must be seen and understood as a mystery. No one looks (Ha! even when perhaps they should, or might) at dust collecting (such a common occurrence) and marvels. Maybe it takes and in itself is a great mystery, to even help us understand how great mystery is!

But no, Moses did not continue on his way (O! just another burning bush being unconsumed…) but turned aside to see (even to seek to understand) “what was going on”.

And what is mystery to some, or one, may not appear as anything noteworthy to another. (Who makes thee to differ from another…? might be a good question to seek answer to) But do you see it (a mystery) here? As Peter spoke to those Jews in Jerusalem of Jesus the Christ:

Him, being delivered by the determined purpose and foreknowledge of God, you have taken by lawless hands, have crucified, and put to death;

Why is this man going on so? (Better, perhaps, “Why do I?”) Why a call for repentance if in one sentence a thing determined by God was carried out…even by an “us” to whom this man Peter speaks as the ones performing…when all we did was according to the carrying out of God’s will? And now even saying our, or some hands were “lawless”?

How can hands be lawless that participate in the fulfilling of God’s will? And therefore, who could say they are?

No, I cant make anyone see it, nor from there, make anyone consider it.

But if you have, you have.

It might even, if looked into, hold a very great key.

But for that we must ask the Keyholder. And perhaps ask and keep asking, seek and keep seeking, knock, and keep knocking.

It would be remiss, especially at this point, to allow any confusion as to the entitling of this short treatise on chewing, and that through psyches. I really don’t know whether there is either a greater, nor truly, any other activity to which man has been assigned.

Taste and see that the Lord is good.

O! But this may sound too coarse, too crass. No doubt it must. The eating of the Lord, even spoken by the Lord as a necessity to those that followed and some that heard, was a bit too much for them also.

But let’s face it, this is what we do. We react to signaling. We gobble it up.

Yes, we do. We hear a thing and seek its source. What has made that sound? What is, or where is, that noise coming from? What does it mean? Of what nature is it? Hunters do it all the time. Squirrels just ruffling through leaves for acorns? Or the measured and deliberate pace of a buck cautiously treading? Is it heavy? Soft? Moving swiftly?

So do mechanics. The sound of a valve ticking holds a far different signal, and signal of consequence than a rod knocking. But the ear must be trained, for the uninformed will simply say, perhaps to one they trust of some knowledge, “My engine is making a noise…should I be concerned?”

And of course this is no less with matters of sight, or any sense. And no less, in matters of relationship…in matter of coming to know another person.

But apply it anywhere, and to anyone or all as far as senses and sensibilities both inform and allow. From termite exterminators on the job, to particle physicists. From mother’s in kitchens hearing a baby’s cry with a discerning, to astronomers seeing a faint pulsing once not seen. We are signal receivers, seekers…and made by some experience, discerners and judges. And it is far more than how we do jobs, it is how we are. And being who we are…is our job.

We “take in”, to whatever measure we do, process according to knowledge and experience and there assign and judge as to significance. “If she turns around when she hits that door, there will be a second date!”

But lest it become frivolous. Of course we do this with one another, with words received as signals, deeds as signals, judging whether the words line up with tones in which they are delivered, body/facial language, conduct, etc. Of course it is plain, and is to us. So much so that when delivering words to a son in the faith a man would say to consider his way of life and conduct for your testing of whether the things I speak to you are from the heart and shown true.

If there is relationship in any relationship, this exchange takes place. And the deeper the relationship or depth of it, which really is defined to the measure that there has been a mutual “taking in”, the plainer signals may become. An attentive husband knows the difference between “I’m fine” and another, but different “I’m fine”. And no less, should this appear only as reference to a husband, a wife knows when something is troubling to her spouse. Or, when he is bright, buoyant, and content.

Whether either cares about what they know of the other, no less, indicates true level of relationship. And who has not had the experience of another “shutting down”? For when we (by our interpretation of signal) sense another cares not for who we are, we do likewise. We may indeed give back a “something”, but it will not be of any of our vulnerability or what might be understood as that which constitutes our weaker, and deeper self. We hold back a part of portion

But yes, we also might give back. It might be sarcasm, cleverness, even cold harsh words or demeanor…and to extreme the muzzle of a gun. Consider the stalker who has manufactured what he believes is a relationship, but is all and only in fantasy…confronted with the harsh reality of one (that he or she has some desire toward) who neither knows him (or her) nor cares to. And what has, not infrequently, resulted. If the thing sought for a pleasure turns rather to a stark and unacceptable tormenting reality…remove that reality.

Mutuality and relation(ship) cannot but go hand in hand; as both indication of relationship and its depth. And another thing we might as well face, were we to think all our judgments are so well and acutely tuned that this might only happen…to another…of the man who comes home early from work, or the woman who finds a strange pair of panties in the back seat of his car. Someone was either not telling the truth about who they are to an “other”, or that other was either completely deceived and unable to discern. Either way, a deceiver and/or being in the estate of being able to be deceived are equally necessary for working, and of mischief. It matters not, in one sense, whether one eliminates the deceiver or enlightens the one capable of being deceived, “it” no longer works or has any working, in that case.

This has some significance for us. Especially if convinced of any relation(ship) to, and in, the Lord Jesus Christ. O! but what we have entered in finding entrance made in Him!

Are we able to hear this?

And needed not that any should testify of man: for he knew what was in man.

This is speaking of Jesus’ knowing: “for he knew what was in man.”

Or this:

But those things which proceed out of the mouth come forth from the heart; and they defile the man. For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies: These are the things which defile a man: but to eat with unwashen hands defileth not a man.

Do you not think that in this also knowing…of man, his ways, his contents of heart and its spewings through mouth, how that we all either have, or yet to some extent still do, judge by outward appearance? Yes, Jesus touches deep things of man, things man prefer hidden, or obscured by words and outward showing of pieties and cleanliness, lest the darkness and filth be exposed as where it is, and for what it is. But it’s too late for us, Jesus has chewed through, even in His being as a man, to know and see all that is there.

But, thanks be to God! He tells us the physician comes not for the well, but for the sick. O! but this is a wonder of grace and mercy! For who, knowing of such “hearts”…would themselves be a sacrifice for them? This wonder is all and only that can keep us from darkest cynicism’s overwhelming, this truth, this kindness, is all and only what can save us from being lost to and in that abyss…when we see it, for it would surely suck us in, no less. Even showing we are already…sucked in…decrepit, shameful…and without hope.

The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?

Yes, do not let this wonder ever escape us, that only One who has or had ever known the heart of man (who can know it?) is also the only one who saves from its hopeless depths. And yes, it is in all unreasonable to any man’s reason, for the more one knows and sees, the more one is convinced of its rightful judgment and condemnation. Even that that would be only “right” end of such…and without any hope given. “Save that thing in possession of such a heart! Really?”…”Unbelieveable!” But, we are also saved from utter cynicism. It is not merely it would take a miracle to do, it would take something completely not understood…to even care to.

Yet, here’s the thing…we are given Jesus to eat, to take in, to chew upon, to digest, to (God help me) even judge as to whether any fault is found in Him…that we may know who He is, and by and through this, know His God and Father…as even our God…and Father. And something happens in eating…of things taken in as food…that are absorbed to become the us we are.

Listen if you can. Listen if you will, and made able by a will not your own. Consider this working:

Yet it pleased the LORD to bruise him; he hath put him to grief: when thou shalt make his soul an offering for sin, he shall see his seed, he shall prolong his days, and the pleasure of the LORD shall prosper in his hand.

when thou shalt make his soul an offering for sin,

It should be first clear that the soul being offered, or only soul to offer, is not one’s own. It is a “his” soul of the one being spoken of, a “his soul” given to another as, and for, an offering for sin. O! but this in itself is too marvelous and unspeakably deep! Who can do such, who would do such? Who is able, or has such authority as to make way for, and also tell a man…”you not only have some right to it granted, but you must take what is another’s as your offering (and not one’s own) to be reconciled…and this to the God of all gods, the Creator and Maker of all things…to have or know peace with Him.”

Can you let this wonder work in you? Will…you? There is no other way…it has been settled already and forever. Who gives such right…and how right…is it?

Well, to and for us, a man can do with his own as he pleases. He can keep or give. Share or withhold, horde or distribute, he is under nothing but is own disposition and right to do with his own, as he so cares or is pleased to do. I speak as a man. When another seeks to take from a man what is that man’s apart from assent it is unlawful, criminal, thievery. Of assent he must be sure lest he brought to the courts, he may say (but will not get by saying) “it was on his porch, looking unused as though he didn’t want it; so, I assumed it was for the taking…that’s all” Without some prior contract or affirming “all on my porch is free for taking”…the thief is headed for, and in, judgment.

Of course the above is only example, and poor at that. What we speak of and are given to dealing with and handling in for understanding, are far, far deeper than the mere legalities of things as such legalities might be understood. Especially those of man.

Can you understand this? And then, can you understand this:

To all the world, and those of it and in it, (O! but consider! For the love of Christ, consider) Jesus Christ is a man with no concern for His own life.

He played (or rather lived) especially, or even in His time in the world in being found in fashion as a man, by care for none of the rules that govern all others. He lived by, and in, and because of the Spirit of life…that He is. (Religious growlers, go away, I hear you, come back when you are summoned). No (and for the love of Christ, understand) He was under no compulsion then to break any rule, nor did He go about with intent to do so (in truth the only man who ever keeps the law) not seeking to be offense, in truth, because He already knew and knows what an offense He is. He knew He was that particular stone of stumbling. No need to exaggerate it. It is enough He be whom He is.

He cared not for His own life at all. When authorities were pressed to bring Him under their control, to eke or squeeze out from Him some acquiescence to their authority (which would show He had care to his own life, even as they suffered such necessity to make display of caring…even for remaining) He didn’t care. No show of “I’d better submit to show I want or need to remain in their (even the) world.”

Ahh…Caesar! We’ll send Him to Caesar! Who has more power to bring to bear for breaking…than Caesar? (All the while making big show of their confession of “their” god…as God)

Before Caesar, the same. He didn’t rebel. He didn’t say “you’d better not put me to death, you have no right”, nor “no, I am not going to carry that torture stake, I know your intents when I ascend that hill…why would I comply…what are you going to do anyway if I refuse to carry it?…kill me?”

Ha ha ha. He already knew…even long before they did!

When Jesus spoke of those going about to kill Him well before He was handed over to Caesar, what was the reply?

“Now we know you have a demon, no one is going about to kill you!” Ha ha ha.

O! But we are too plain before the Lord’s sight! Laugh or cry.

Now listen, no doubt some of those same still think “no, we didn’t go about to kill you, you brought this on yourself, that’s all”. “There are rules to follow to show you care and can show you “can be” (even) in the (or our) world…and you follow…none!” Before Caesar, the same. “Don’t you know I have power to kill you or let you go?” (C’mon man…show me a little submission to the game here, my wife already had a bad dream about all of this…) Ha!

What worse thing to say to what thinks it holds all the authority…than to remind it that authority, as it truly is (as you claim it truly is in even having it over me) is all and only granted by the all Authority (if one truly believes authority, of which one may even boast, exists). No He didn’t have to press it, He didn’t have to say, “So tell me, did you make yourself a Caesar? And “Of Caesar”…or were you appointed? Go ahead, tell the Caesar that made you a Procurator...you’ll stand on your own”.

I believe Jesus knew Pilate “got it”. Even if he couldn’t bring himself to fall before such truth…for even he still feared the jews carrying some accusation he was no friend of Caesar if Pilate let Him go. But Jesus was always finding more faith among the heathen. The outsiders, like a Centurion or a Syrophoenician woman who said “even the dogs get the crumbs that fall”, or that Samaritan who showed mercy, or the woman at the well.

In this case Pilate, unable to refute the truth except by question “what is truth?” and got rather clever than submit as the Centurion had, to recognition and confession of how authority operates, and is, and how He saw it by faith, as Jesus operating/working…living, speaking, acting as one under it…(Hey! have you? often found faith where you didn’t suspect…or expect it to be?)

But anyway, Jesus didn’t put out any of the “acceptable” signals we all know, for showing we treasure our lives, or are worthy of “being allowed” by the world…to remain in the world. So hey, yeah, since He’s just leaving it all on the porch and it looks like He doesn’t care about or for it, let’s just take it. So it was. Even according to God’s plan and purpose.

Yes, all the scriptures, all the matters of authority and submission…all are there…and all are lawful. And absolutely so. Yep, Caesar has authority. Pharisees had some authority “do as they say for they sit in Moses seat…but don’t be “like them”…for a lawful thing can be exercised…unlawfully. And don’t care, nor have any at all, God will show.

There is nothing hidden except to be revealed.

O the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! how unsearchable are his judgments, and his ways past finding out!

Utter weakness. Total necessity. In need of all the help there is. Tribulations abounding. Rebukes and chastenings, corrections seemingly unending. And on top of it all (but who knows bottom from top?) one of our stellar (again, who knows bottom from top?) comrades in arms comes toward the end of his pursuits and declares himself (and any who can receive it, likewise?) “chiefest of sinners”. Not used to be, not was, but for those with eye to precision in every other circumstance, those who (not wrongly) oft resort to the Greek for such precision, even of tenses, “of whom I am chief”.

Yikes! Who signs up…for this? Who could, or would set out to know such…even of themselves?
Isn’t there a way…different than this? Another option? “Can I see another menu, please?” Or, “What other courses does your school offer?” could come to mind.

Would you find laughter here…cruel? Perhaps so, but only if one does not recognize their own self. Wasn’t this all to get us to feel better…about ourselves? (How much laughter can one endure?)

Hey! Is laughter also included in these all things:

For all things are yours; Whether Paul, or Apollos, or Cephas, or the world, or life, or death, or things present, or things to come; all are yours; And ye are Christ’s; and Christ is God’s. (?)

Oh yes! If there’s laughter (what sort of feast would refuse it?) we can only know it is of the “good” kind. Do you find any prohibition against starting to practice? Do you imagine the same man that declared himself a “chief”, and who also spoke of his experience(s) of being beside himself for the Lord’s sake (as one sort of “out of his mind” for Christ) suffered this in all somber tones?

But, God forbid I deny a need for sobriety, and not eschew cruelty. Or worse, provoke to some laughing contest…remembering that comparisons and competitions over others (and not our own self) are left to the world’s pursuit.

Yet what is such joy described that a self just can’t believe based upon all prior understanding (but dead…means dead!), when seeing the Lord alive…and provoked to disbelief for joy? Such astounding? (Hey!…but we thought…I mean we saw…I mean some of us even saw the spear…!!!)

Yet, didn’t He tell them? What has to make way…for His word? What cannot but…make way for His word? Yes, even death. Specifically death. And darkness.

Too much? May it always and always be so, and not so. May the goodness that is too much, the kindness that is too much, the joy that is too much, the very life that is too much…never submit to our poor plea of “this is just too much”. And there relent. Yes, we need God to even need God. And we need God to have God. And we need God to make way in us, for God.

Is His way made in us?

Too much?

Too simple?

I am not unaware of how often I am given to mention this matter of our signing up vs. God’s conscription of us. Regardless of whether one has come to see God’s choosing always exceeds what a man knows of his own, and his own ability to do so as a created being, and how that knowledge either informs choice or this is not yet understood, I hope to not be dogmatic. Nevertheless we see, as in the first disciples example there was a continuance for a time until told “you have not chosen me, but I have chosen you…”

Till then it matters not what or how they thought of this relationship to the one they followed, nor to us even of how they themselves may have even thought of it, but once that word comes (as it surely came to them) their matter of choice in that becomes moot. Yes, one could (I suppose) say “But what if they chose not to believe that?” But I hope you see the issue there. It is as “too late” for them as it is for you and I, even as those who receive their testimony of Jesus the Christ as always speaking truth, as He Himself is the truth. And being true, in all, to His word. He cannot be separated from what He Says, does, and is. He is of God.

And here would be another question, to, or of whom are these scriptures in owing for their deliverance to us? If all recorded (if one believes, even for us) is owing only to the choice of men to what they would put down in writing for recording and not of inspiration and guidance as to what and only is to be and was to be written, in what have we placed (if we have) any trust? That men are faithful guides? Or God alone through Christ, by whom, through whom, and in whose name the Spirit we confess, is given? Even that Spirit we confess as makes the scripture as real to us, for they have come from Him who is real, and faithful. No, we do not seek after nor follow myths.

These things have I spoken unto you, being yet present with you. But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you.

and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you.

Yes, there is reason of God’s choosing that even those words were remembered (or better, brought to memory by that Spirit) and recorded, along with the several others “you have not chosen me, but I have chosen you”. May you find as much comfort in them as in any or all the others that to you, have been made life. For they are, and no less.

Dreams, visions, and revelations. Words and pictures, pictures and words…except that to us they are and become not mere copies of things as a photo might. They are views and informing of the reality of matters. And they are promised us no less than the knowing of the sufferings and life of our Lord, God’s Christ. Even they (such knowing) must come in same manner. The light must go “on” to see, and it is far from unusual such light does indeed go on when we find ourselves in matters or circumstance of extremity.

For some it has been reconciled to them that their “being in the world” while not of it, has informed them of their necessity of all help, all comfort, all light, for there is none to be found in it (the wold). Yes, it is a place of extremity, of extreme darkness. They are to the world strangers, even as the world has become strange to them, a foreign place, and surely not their home. Of such do we read, even their writings, while yet knowing they are of purpose sent into it by their Master as those sent into it, even as He. And such purposing that is of all goodness, all knowing-ness, all mercy and kindness is that even such benefit might abound. The knowledge of God through His Christ. It is to abound in us, even as its abounding in one is of all mutual benefit…to all who are of Him.

And whether one member suffer, all the members suffer with it; or one member be honoured, all the members rejoice with it.

When we begin to see, not merely the futility and vanity of refusing to know the sufferings of our Christ, we are also exempting ourselves from the honor bestowed upon Him, even the glory of which He speaks as being given…to “them”…to us, made a gift through such suffering.

And the glory which thou gavest me I have given them; that they may be one, even as we are one:

God help me. For I am weak.

Surgeon’s training was mentioned. See one, do one, teach one. With necessity of sight being first that the consequence of doing and teaching be also upon the foundation of seeing first an expert in his doing. A teacher, whom, if he is shoddy, and not expert, will pass on poor practice.

Who then is the Christ of God? Perfect expert? Or other?

Does He bear worthiness of total attention to all He teaches, and does? Does he suffer questioning, or is He strident? Is He mute to pleas for explanation and light of understanding, or does He answer all asking, seeking, knocking?

Does He not “do” as He teaches?

Seeing, first, always; and always, first.

There was some light cast upon all the “How To’s” we may seek, and are seemingly in demand by us to get to some place of finding a “better working” for us. These are not eschewed for their intent, but only if seen as some addition necessary, some further thing needed of men to be given by men to one another that is made just too obscure in Christ. But, is it?

Yet Jesus the Christ as given us such a wonderful and inexhaustibly kind instruction in His “how to” in the giving what He even called a new commandment. And yes, seeing is paramount here, as it always is.

Love one another even as I have loved you.

Can we? Look? Can we see? Is it too hard? Too “much”?

Who is ashamed to see the “how much” of the Lord’s consistent love has been shed abroad to them, or find displeasure in being told to look and see there…so that they, in seeing the just how much (how deep is it?) they have been loved by the Lord who has called them, they can and will and must…love in like manner? Who is disappointed to see that how much?

Paul wasn’t. “Who loved me, and gave Himself for me…”

What better hunt is there? To be directed to, even commanded to…explore for knowing? To know the love of Christ, for you?

See first, and that no shoddy workmanship is there presented. Even stay there and all that might be consequent of doing/teaching…will be shown as also and perfectly being accomplished, by the only one who gives light to the blind.

Blessed are the dead who die in the Lord from now on, blessed indeed says the Spirit, for they have ceased from their labors and their deeds follow with them.

How could one not tell of what He sees of the Lord’s doing(s)? That would be hard work indeed, miserable work in truth…thankless and joyless a job could never be more assigned. Resistance and friction, friction and resistance…yet…even such heat found there works to its end. Yes, even friction is caused to work perfectly in the hand of the Master.

“For we can nothing against the truth, only for it” has been written.

Are you oily? Is any?

Thou hast loved righteousness, and hated iniquity; therefore God, even thy God, hath anointed thee with the oil of gladness above thy fellows.

And whether one member suffer, all the members suffer with it; or one member be honoured, all the members rejoice with it.

Is His honor…enough for all our rejoicing?

Is there enough…there?

Too much?

Seeing, understanding, words to pictures, pictures to words all and only to that one end whence is that one end of man, the apprehension of Jesus Christ, is all and only in Christ and done of God.
Jesus is that man…alone, made in the image and likeness of God…proving faithful to it. No man formed or forms his own eye to see, his own ear to hear, nor his own mind to understanding.

How many undercut their own unbelief and either prove themselves hypocrites to it, or their own faith (again proving themselves hypocrite to it) by holding any conviction, deep as it may be, that “the purpose of the eye” or “the purpose of the ear…” by denying, or refusing to concede to that first principle (even if only self held) of purpose. Purpose presupposes a thing…a thing that provides purposing (and reason) to a function or end. So it is, no less, with mind and consciousness. The faith of any man may be undercut (as it must be if it is only their own) by any refusing to see or hear what the Lord says. Jesus is the perfection of orderliness to man…made manifest. And surely then His word(s), whether understood or not, appreciated or not, taken in, or not, nevertheless hold all, that in poverty of words, a man such as myself would express as pertinent. Important. Solely worthy of consideration.

Search yourself as need be, do you desire (with a desire provided, if provided) anything less than a sure thing? If you are persuaded you are not created from “maybe”, then surely you are not created for it. Of what…are you sure? Yes! A need to know. Our brother Paul was not frivolously speaking when writing “that I may know Him…” For all that was of such “may” that could seem to go either way so to speak, had to be removed. And Paul had already spoken of what he had lost and counted as dung in that pursuit. All his own standing. That he be found standing only in One, and one thing (are we convinced, yet?)

And be found in him, not having mine own righteousness, which is of the law, but that which is through the faith of Christ, the righteousness which is of God by faith:

Too lofty? Or is it too familiar as in “But gee, everyone knows that already”? How careful “may” we be to see we have not become dull of hearing? If we haven’t yet learned how good a thing it is to have another “watching out for us”, we can. Even a one who “ever liveth to make intercession for us”. Even when we think “we know already”. Lessons may be painful, but they are lessons nonetheless. Happy might be the man who learns to tell on himself (confess your faults to one another) before being exposed as the man who refuses, and has, to do so. But we will talk later about the “man of sin” if God allows. Where he is, and how he can only be seen, in order he be plainly exposed to being known, except by a revealing. And how, as a created thing he must take his place already assigned, under the Lord’s feet. Even in all subjection to a new creation.

And God forbid I be found presenting myself as one who has apprehended, as one who does not know of himself things that rightly be counted to utter shame when brought up against what was claimed by that man as already known. Thanks be to God for such mercy as can cause a man to stand in the light of these words…”Why do you call me Lord, Lord…”. One simply cannot boast of His mercy apart from some knowing of its necessity.

But let’s face it, if we can. Can we? We are all in some search of, some gaining of, some understanding of a “how” that will help us. And it is not as if God Himself does not know this of us. Even in sending of His own son as all the how…He knows questions remain, and these matters are not “not good.” But whether they be good in God’s sight only God can show. A writer (of Hebrews) speaks of those who through use have had some exercise.

But strong meat belongeth to them that are of full age, even those who by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern both good and evil.

We are not called to the mere inheritance of Adam’s only knowing that good and evil exist with no knowledge of any discerning between them. For him life itself then was to himself…a gamble. And so he was given gamblers odds, yet odds he could never calculate from. Odds he could not accept. Left always trying to beat the table. Who does not know this of their own Adam?

So, and still, much may be found…abounding. Of how to beat the table, or better one’s odds. “How to Pray Effective Prayers” and the like, of holding some vague promise that one can get from God (when all is already given) a something by praying as another treatise might indicate “Prayers That Move God”, or “How To Have Faith That Works” and the like.

Our “how to” in Christ is a bit different. But it is not to the end of beating the table, but of seeing how abundantly a table is set and has been set, before us.

Yet, in even all the other “how to’s” might things nevertheless, be gleaned? God knows. Just as God knows such “how” of how, and what, we are in total need of. And how superstitions abound to such uninformed need as against its true being of being both dire, and total. Sometimes we think or act from silly notion of needing only a little help.

Even the natural man is forever found “blowing on his dice” inwardly before a roll, an attempt, an adventure, an escapade or excursion. But we who (if we are) are called know something of this sense that nothing less than a “sure thing” suffices. We are made of a surety (Of God are we in Christ Jesus) to an end of surety. We are to be established. And we learn here, there is no gaming the Judge of all. At all.

Listen if you can, and are made able. We are in all the real that is. Yes, even all the trouble…there is. (God help me!) We are prone to whatever extent we are to parse words, to exempt some or exerpt some according to our own preferences. To even gloss over some (and their significance) until such is incumbent upon us…to know. Such matters of answer so often lead to even greater matters of question that were it not for mercy and grace, their sheer weight of depths and gravity would surely undo us. Irremediably undo us.

We are set to a hunt, not at all unlike Paul who (if one believes and can see) strove mightily to present both what he was after, while not seeking to cover all his own weakness uncovered in that pursuit. He knew something of a necessity that knowing anything less, or other than Christ as his life…was not a sure thing. In fact he was so sure of his weakeness(es) he came to boast of them…for to him they had their purpose revealed, that the power of Christ might rest upon him. Total weakness, meet perfect power.

Is there any other way?

Is there anything uncomfortable to you in reading this, something preferred to be “glossed over” (God forbid ignored) rather than be investigated? Sought for understanding? Are we like Peter who, upon hearing the Lord telling of all that would be done him did some quick internal tallying and understood with some fear “He is the Lord, He is sent for me to follow, I am following…and therefore…what is His experience is going to be made my own” Uh oh! Jesus knew it wasn’t compassion for Him speaking in rebuke to Him “far be it from you Lord”. Jesus’s surely had senses exercised to discern good and evil…and knew who and what was speaking. And why.

And, it wasn’t compassion. And He addressed it.

Oh, yes flattery “you are too good for such a thing” can’t game the Judge. Neither does manipulation, our maneuvering, our attempts to gain favor (when all is already given) or our trying to figure out “how” this works so it will work better for me…avail. Woo boy, yes, we’re in a place and in communion with a real…person. The real person from whom all other personhood is found originating. And all our misjudgments and practices according to what this once meant to us, “to know a person” are all being trashed…to be realigned. All the matters we use and try upon others to get from them (ha ha, even wives at times!) don’t work here. Happy is the man who finds a wife made from the substance of Christ! He may find perfection, at times to him perhaps a too perfect frustration in seeing what a manipulator can’t do. Can’t accomplish. Cannot avail. Can’t get, according to manipulation!

So, does this cause some upsetting?

For though he was crucified through weakness, yet he liveth by the power of God. For we also are weak in him, but we shall live with him by the power of God toward you.

“Wait! Wait!” one might say, “I didn’t sign up for this!” That’s right…we didn’t. We didn’t enlist, we are conscripts. And the terms of peace with our Captain are His, not our own. The terms of life are His, not ours. The way is His, not ours. This does much to unconfuse the “who’s who” in this Kingdom we are given. Or, do we want confusion? Confounding?

To him who has, more shall be given…(or do we not so much like that application to this instance?)

Yes, at first the finding of just how weak one is made in Christ, even toward Christ whose head is God is strange to us, even unwanted…but then we may learn how well this equips us to not overlook a still, small voice. The voice of our salvation. We become weak…toward it.

Yes, we are in a place we are given to handle, but can’t to our own ends. Is that itself…troubling? As if that is not made yet true enough to us, dare we also be made able to receive this: (though I dare no one, God forbid I present a challenge)

And with all deceivableness of unrighteousness in them that perish; because they received not the love of the truth, that they might be saved. And for this cause God shall send them strong delusion, that they should believe a lie: That they all might be damned who believed not the truth, but had pleasure in unrighteousness.

And for this cause God shall send them strong delusion, that they should believe a lie: 

We are where God is doing all, even through Christ, where once we thought ourselves of some power or influence; even delighted in it, even found pride in it. Power to us was very important. It signaled a way to keep some calamity at bay, all the while ignorant of the real calamity in our souls of being so devoted to seeking it alone. And at any cost to the soul. Ours and those of others. But then we were touched by the true power of all, enough to give life in spirit, and light to the soul. A “someone” was made very small for our sakes, even that He might enter and “fit” into our heart, an also thing once so very small…and hard. And having entered as seed, He grows, and the place of our habitations, our hearts, the deepest place from which we know life and motive, also is expanded. And how many we find now…”in there”! Christ, and all of His! Lengthen your cords, and strengthen your stakes. This place we now live is really really large. Entered through a small door, so narrow, so singular, and so precious. The seed of God…His very Word.

Nothing here is to our harm, and power for, or against anything here would not only be unnecessary, but shown vain. Even as Paul came to understand, as having no dominion over anyone’s faith. Yet helpers in joy even as we have received such help. And we find the joy of the Lord is indeed, strength.

But who can deny such learning…is? Our being given to see Christ and know Him to the measure of such giving of sight. Even through those times of much troubling of waters when we might even find ourselves asking “Lord, do you not care that we perish?”

Yes…storms show some power, even as all things of creation are given some power of expression. From neutrinos to a whole of a universe. But, we are in the Maker and Doer of all. In whom we live, and move, and have our being.

And yes, at the first some (or many) things seem disturbing. Even such notion that God alone “handles” delusion to His ends. Even such as is called “strong”. “O!” but we may say “that is because God is in some reaction to a thing He discovers or finds resisting Him” as though God Himself was in some need of finding out the who and what of all that is made by His hand, and for His good pleasure. Have we forgotten what foundation stands sure? The Lord knows those who are His.

O!, yes, we may not (yet, or fully), but God surely does!

Even Jesus proceeded with the disciples for such time allowed Him and they until such time as a certain thing was to be spoken…”You have not chosen me, but I have chosen you…and ordained you…”

There was this thing of which they were then to be informed per God’s purpose in and through Christ, and it surely disabuses any notion of their being with Jesus the Christ of their own preference, will, or even merit. And yes, God forbid, if we even find some pride at some notion of being the better than another (for pride will seek the slightest crack for entry) in such choosing, or even knowing of it, we are reminded Judas himself…is also a chosen. Yes, God has a way of handling…all. Especially pride.

Where is boasting then?

Our focus gets adjusted, our sight narrowed, even while horizons broaden. We begin to see those “coming from afar”, sons and daughters…even out from the strangest of places; even of places we once thought were all hardened in unbelief and in some way consigned to being the “off limits”; the too far gone, the too self loving, the too rebellious, too devious, too deluded, or too resistant. Even the too religious. and superstitious. At least until God shows us this mercy through Christ of how in all our own superstition, we too, inwardly are found blowing on our dice before a roll in a gamble we hope will turn out well for us.

You are made of a sure “thing” and for a sure thing, and there can be no joy in anything but, for you.
Even should you find you are the chiefest of sinners. We would not be the first to be let in on a mystery. And for whom Christ came.

The secret of the LORD is with them that fear him; And he will shew them his covenant.

Who can deliver out of His hand? Who can deliver into His hand? The ins and outs of things…set upside down and right side up through only One.

In considering the Lord’s presence in this world (as for now those who of us whom are yet in the world) as present in His body is a matter of truth. Here could be’s, should be’s, ought to be’s, might be’s must give way and afford all preeminence to that truth. Simplicity of a matter should never be confused with an ease of it, even when we find simplicity manifest does much (if not all) to make a thing once hard, easy. That almost sounds like paradox, doesn’t it? Perhaps almost is understatement.

In surgical circles I have heard this so often repeated that I cannot but believe its ubiquity among (once) students as learned from masters in their schooling is not confined to any particular region, program, peculiar methods of instruction, or sequestered group. “See one. Do one. Teach one.” in regards to certain procedures. (No doubt it takes more than the seeing of “one” neurosurgery to be let loose upon a next patient)

But the principle of observe, then do, and then teach for both any particular disciple of medicine, and for the passing on of such skill or knowledge to the end of its preservation and promulgation, is sound. But if, and only if, what is first observed is sound in practice and execution, otherwise a promotion of error(s) (if, let’s say, a teacher is shoddy) will ensue. Nevertheless, the first lesson of seeing remains preeminent and unbreakable in consequence(s); if what is seen is right and sound there is a right expectation of benefit, if what is seen is not right…well, you may understand. A student may be corrected…even later by encountering a right practitioner (who might not be able to avoid “Who taught you to do it like that? No wonder you have had to deal with so many post op infections!) but, if he is amenable to changing, even entering as though again to become a “student” he may learn a better way.

Here, of course, the analogy to medicine or surgical practice breaks down irretrievably. It cannot but be so, for there is nothing of the world nor its manner(s) that can either contain nor be fully applicable to the Kingdom we enter. And that as disciples. We are never given papers or certificates of practice that say “such and such a one’s education has been satisfactorily completed to some standard” and then can hang out a shingle. We remain in school. We remain as disciples, being taught. Even if we find ourselves in some area or arena where instruction is called for and we are granted some grace of help(ing) it is always as those still “under” instruction ourselves. We may even find what we once thought a “pull” upon us to give out (to another in seeming lack) was far less for their teaching, than our own. Oh, yes, God has a way. And a way of reminding us we are under instruction, always, as disciples. There’s even hope for the verbose.

But, as with medicine or “doctors” so we may find it amongst ourselves. “I am no novice! I will not again be put under instruction, after all, I am a teacher…(pastor, evangelist, prophet, apostle…etc”), or “I been through some things!” Aha! or ha ha ha? “I am recognized…and therefore recognize myself…” as whatever. Ha, ha, ha. Yes, this school is quite different. “I’ve been a christian for such and such years…therefore…”

No, nothing is of any account here, or Yes, something is of only account here…the Christ of God.
(Do I “beat that horse”…enough…to qualify myself? Ha, ha, ha!)

Of whom it is even spoken (yes, even that Christ, Jesus)

“Though He were a son yet learned He obedience through the things that He suffered”

Listen if you can. If you are made able.

We are not only allowed to question, we are instructed to…ask, seek, knock. And we might even question the sufferings of Christ as to gain some understanding. What are they…these things suffered? Am I even really…allowed to ask? How can I know if they are understood of right depth? Death of material form? Surely…but…all men die, after all. Others have died…in service to ideals. Even Nazis. (too much?) “Good” men have thrown themselves on grenades for comrades. “Good” men have made sacrifices to many an end they deem worthy. “Good” philanthropists. Mere suffering of some consequence to circumstance undeserved? Mandela comes to mind, who was imprisoned for opposing apartheid. There must be something different! There must be something that can be known that will help show the inexplicable depths of this matter upon which some standing is given, some understanding wrought, some insight gleaned.

What O! what is it? I need this answer not even “for others” (as it may seem when my testimony is rebuffed) but when in extremis (or such as I may consider myself in) to know that what I have confessed, have held, have trusted in as true…is true. (Do you doubt a man can be brought to such a place of being pressed to question?)

Do you think “God would not do or allow that…press me to such question!”?

Here’s another question. Do you think Paul was adventurous, or at very least, an explorer of the Kingdom into which he was drafted as a chosen one? Do you even believe Paul was a chosen one? He surely had/has many things to say of his findings there, if you believe him faithful. Do you? Or, do you think him no more than an automatic writer in some sense, a man who sat down with pen to tell (and/or explain) of things while in some trance like state? Of things that came to him apart from any understanding or experience? What do you think? Did he know? Or was he writing on the fly, so to speak? Some of both?

Let’s go deeper, then. What about Jesus (our Christ) in His saying neither the works nor the words were of himself. Did He know a difference? Was there some discerning of what could be said by Him but withheld, so that He would only speak the words given Him to speak, only do the works given Him to do? Some knowing of words that were not his own, yet coming forth from Him? Did He not then also know what not to say that might issue from Himself so that He could honestly say (even being given these very words to say):

…the words that I speak unto you I speak not of myself: but the Father that dwelleth in me, he doeth the works.

In that case even those words are to be trusted as given from the Father. And someone is “letting us in on” an operation taking place in Jesus the Christ Himself…a knowing discerning between self (and what a man might recognize as his own self) and what is coming from on High from one greater, and as all, is all and only to be said. Or done. Really then, what sort of knowing are we to have of this man, Jesus, God’s Christ, of whom we so often make mention of “having His mind”? Any? None?

And so, we find ourselves coming back to Paul (and any true apostle one may have for reference and instruction) particularly in his declaration:

But we have the mind of Christ.

Now, it is not something so easily repeated, is it, as if learned by rote? For one learns (or may) how that Jesus always speaks in and of absolutes, even if or when such words seem gray or fuzzy to us, not yet clear but nevertheless tell of something there, something real; and we are persuaded by such sensing. Such sensing is gift, treasure it if even (or better, especially when) all things appear turned upside down toward you…for we are being turned…right side up.

Listen to what I find a “funny” story. You may not find it so, but as God is witness to its happening (does that in itself make a thing true?) I find it able to bear repeating. Stop me if you have heard it, for it is not something I have kept secret.

A man on his way to work was talking to and with the Lord one morning of a thing (or things) he was seeking to understand. He had a sensing of their reality and (to him) importance. He was found trying to explain to the Lord his present experience, reduce to words how he was in this “it” that what was, and being sought for clarity. And found himself saying this: “Lord, it’s like something is there for understanding, for seeing, but it’s kinda like “it’s” moving behind a gauzy curtain, I know there’s motion and something real going on there but I just can’t see enough to grasp it, if you know what I mean?

If you know what I mean? Came back to the man before? as soon as? in a moment in the twinkling of an eye? the final “n” in mean was said.

If YOU KNOW, what I mean? Oh, the laughter there! A man asking God if God knows what the man is trying to express. As though the man in his best attempt at explaining his estate, condition, state of mind in relation to a certain matter could wonder if he had done “well enough”, explained sufficiently enough, given an adequate example or analogy…ha ha! That GOD might understand what the man…means.

Yes…the joke was on me! But the laughter was too abundant, too pure, too consuming and enveloping that even that matter sought for understanding is forgotten now as of being any import. The “other” thing that took place (and I am now so convinced was ordained to take place, provoked even by some lack of understanding) was that a far more important matter for understanding might come to that man. Gee, had he always thought like that? God can only “get the man” if the man is precise enough, exact enough, makes use of just the right words to “get God” to understand himself and where the man is in circumstance and situation?

When it becomes plain to the man that he does not even begin to understand the nature and knowing of the One he is addressing…what would you rather have? Laughter…or something else? Is it ever too late to say, or know “Man! but was I all wet, all wrong…all foolish”? And see (and hear) One laughing with you? Even how you were maneuvered to it…thankfully.

And what about…now? Can you find, have you found a “good” laugh…to be found? Good as in absolutely good. What does good cheer look like to you, so much so that we are told to “be of it” when tribulations abound…for another has overcome? Who gets to say such a thing? Who could have such authority…to not only say such a thing and that He also has the power to show it so? To have power over all that appears contradictory? All that appears paradox? All that appears foolish to the senses? Who alone can show what is past, or beyond all these “things”?

Are you in “spirit” with those who have finished their race? Well, an answer could be obvious if one is in spirit with the Finisher. The author even…of “the race”. (Of what race are you? I?…what’s our nationality? Citizenship? From where are we born?) Is the race of faith, that good fight we are told is good, is it a thing, an it, or do we share it, and in it, as in One…person?

Who are you, Lord?

“How” are you, Lord?

Do we share it (this common race hood) with those who once asked a man sleeping in a boat while a storm threatened them with such words as “Lord, do you not care that we perish?”

Really?

That’s a funny one, too.

What a strange company we find ourselves in. And there, at the head, walks (or sits) the chief bishop/shepherd, apostle of our faith, and High Priest Himself, Jesus, the Christ of God. Having done all earning of anything that may be earned of any value and eternal matter, He is. At least as far as any work may be concerned to any earning, any reward for doing, any inheritance due for being true to a Father from whom all is given.

I have glorified thee on the earth: I have finished the work which thou gavest me to do.

He said.

And this is said of Him from on High:

But unto the Son he saith, Thy throne, O God, is for ever and ever: a sceptre of righteousness is the sceptre of thy kingdom.

Thou hast loved righteousness, and hated iniquity; therefore God, even thy God, hath anointed thee with the oil of gladness above thy fellows.

And, Thou, Lord, in the beginning hast laid the foundation of the earth; and the heavens are the works of thine hands:

They shall perish; but thou remainest; and they all shall wax old as doth a garment;

And as a vesture shalt thou fold them up, and they shall be changed: but thou art the same, and thy years shall not fail. But to which of the angels said he at any time, Sit on my right hand, until I make thine enemies thy footstool?

He alone, Jesus Christ alone, that Son, alone, that being (both noun and verb at once) in Spirit (yet found in fashion as a man) is He to whom all honor and glory is given. Rightly is He called Lord.

All given in and to this strange (is peculiar better said?) company in which we find ourselves comes from Him, through Him as all that is in Him, by the Holy Spirit given in, and through, His name. Man, but don’t we find there’s a lot…to Him! In Him, and through Him…even to the inclusion of this peculiar company amongst which we find ourselves. This “company” is no less in Him! How much is there, or here! (I am always limited to understatement) For “How much!” does not begin to express the all that He is as all in all, but a man has to start somewhere; and perhaps profound wonder, which leads to even deeper wonder is not a bad place of beginning. And, here we are.

Yet, it’s not a club. Not an organization. Not even so much as a group or grouping as would lend itself to our understanding. We are in, and of, a living body. Really, the only living body there is in the earth. In that body that was raised from the dead out from the heart of the earth and has ascended to the God whom He calls “my God and your God, my Father, and your Father”. And if you (or I) are captivated by Him it is because you (or I) were captured by Him, who took captivity (to once another) captive. Yep, He’s a conqueror. And let’s be honest (wow! is that even possible?) a something needed conquering if we were to be set free.

We could, of course, go into particulars of each of our enlightenment’s as to what we know were those particular forms of depravity to which we were inclined, but for now it suffices (if we know it of ourselves) to find this an acceptable understanding (as those who have come, or are coming to their senses):

In meekness instructing those that oppose themselves; if God peradventure will give them repentance to the acknowledging of the truth; And that they may recover themselves out of the snare of the devil, who are taken captive by him at his will.

In the above (written by an apostle to a son in the faith) the more usual translation is “may come to their senses and escape” rather than “recover themselves”. This is mentioned for the sense of clarity; for in the one it could seem a man does something to set himself free as opposed to being brought to a sensibility, a showing of how things are, that accomplishes this. There remains only one who sets free, who imparts any sensibility to and of spiritual (true) matters and who holds promise of freedom through continuance in His word. All that is being done in us, is what has been done for us. No small matter lest we confuse the “who’s who” of whence eternal and sufficient work(s) are accomplished.

And it should be plain (if it is not yet to us) that such working of deliverance must first be accomplished in any that would instruct (gently or otherwise) and that their once occupation of same place (once a captive to the devil) is real in understanding to them. It is not as though a foreman (like an apostle) is telling some workers “Hey! be gentle with all those “other kinds of folks” who may be new to this, or unskilled, not like you guys are.” But it is implicit in this that we all had to be set free, and none of these matters originate nor originated in ourselves, or have “come to us only”. There is always a caution against forgetting who delivered us (from what and who) into His Kingdom. If we do not yet know such feelings/senses of superiority are always waiting to take advantage of the believer, well, we must keep going. Pride in all its myriad forms is no small matter to be uncovered, and only one has been shown sufficient to both its uncovering and conquering while keeping Himself from its taint, with any skill or understanding. Yes, vision and sight get narrowed. And this is gift.

Not unlike “trying to be humble”, have you taken a shot at not being proud? Ha! Were you successful enough to think yourself…successful? Oh, but these matters are wonderful! Deep. Deeper than we knew…deep was, or could be. Who can take a man to where all once treasured of himself is despoiled in his sight, yet support him there, keep him from despairing in what otherwise would only be an eternal anguish of having nothing but isolation for himself, left alone to drink his own dregs?

Yes, who? And vision and sight get narrowed.

Where is boasting, then? Of what? And who?

Yes, we are a strange, peculiar company of things assembled in a body. Assembled of matters so intensely personal and exquisitely particular that were it not for a powerful working of joining to a communion we could and would be only left to this thinking “everything is far too personal to find any commonness”. Each is far too different, too uniquely formed to ever “work together”. Or be found so.

Thanks be to God it is not our work or working that is the issue of eternal consequence, but His.

We are left to marvel at how such a One works.

What greater joy is there?

Than to see and know Him in His work?

Were I to find some allowance or grace to claim a ministry (O! but that is rather high, is it not? Some claim of servant hood?) it could only be that of the beating a dead horse variety. Yet even there I tremble, for I am not even good at that. For even if seeing or finding such as may appear something to describe as what might seem a humble calling as to even be called such, O! but I yet reach too high! Yes, I think it better to forego any claim.

Nevertheless, what horse corpses appear available now? Oh, here’s one that fits the bill rather perfectly. Jesus speaks about it.

But which of you, having a servant plowing or feeding cattle, will say unto him by and by, when he is come from the field, Go and sit down to meat? And will not rather say unto him, Make ready wherewith I may sup, and gird thyself, and serve me, till I have eaten and drunken; and afterward thou shalt eat and drink? Doth he thank that servant because he did the things that were commanded him? I trow not. So likewise ye, when ye shall have done all those things which are commanded you, say, We are unprofitable servants: we have done that which was our duty to do.

We often call it the parable of the unworthy servant, called unprofitable in the above. There’s a master (about which little is said except that he is a/the master) and a servant or servants. Did you read it? Have you read it?

O! but doesn’t it seem to be about a certain humility to be found, or instructed toward for a servant to either assume or come to in such service? How to rightly “take place” as a servant so that in the end he might say all that might be said of himself, and of himself is a confession of unworthiness, or unprofitability. After all, he only did what he was shown/commanded to do. He did his duty is all, nothing beyond. He had to be told what to do, and in so doing only did as instructed. He “came up” with nothing of himself “I know! I’ll put a chocolate on the Master’s pillow!” No, his service (such as it was/is) is strictly bounded to only what the Master instructs/commands. In truth, implicit in the words is that nothing “beyond” is to be done, not even attempt at, or any allowance for, going for more than what is commanded. All restricted to, and by, the Master. (Shall I hit that horse again?)

“Oh, look!” we might say, “Jesus is giving a wonderful instruction in humility!” Well, yes, yes He is.

And if we are disciples, even disciples of Jesus Christ, there is some common sensing this matter of humility is very important. Who of us doesn’t either know nor is able to recite with some facility “God resisteth the proud but giveth grace to the humble”? Right? And who in their right mind wants to choose to be resisted by God while consequently, simultaneously, absenting themselves from grace? Ahh we say, this is a good lesson about being humble, I shall therefore think of myself and call myself an unworthy servant! Ahh, c’mon grace…dump it on me, Lord!

Have you tried…to be humble? As in, “Look Lord, look at how hard I am trying to think of myself as unworthy!” C’mon…grace!

I asked a page ago if “LOL” is inappropriate. God knows. As only God knows.

Nevertheless, as a thing ourselves, found in fashion(s) as men, or man, as created things; and if disciples of Jesus Christ, we (of all) know there is a Creator. (Yes, there’s another horse carcass…what do we “know”?)

But of Jesus Christ we also “know” (uh, oh) the words He speaks are spirit, and they are life.

Well, if you have tried “to be humble”, or even thought/believed Jesus’ parable was a good place to plant one’s self for positioning as in “I will think of myself as an unworthy servant just like Jesus recommends…”

(“Hey, Look Father! I’m doing what Jesus says!”)

maybe we should read again. Well, at least if we believe “all” His word(s) are spirit and life to us.

Aren’t these words…there(?):

So likewise ye, when ye shall have done all those things which are commanded you

when ye shall have done all those things which are commanded you

shall have done all those things which are commanded you

all those things which are commanded you

all those things

all.

Does that “fit” you? Then, by all means, you have the right to call yourself an unworthy servant.

(Would “LOLing” be inappropriate here?)

There’s a reason Paul called himself less than the least.

Safety.

Here’s an interesting thing about aiming. If the target is fuzzy, out of focus, not seen clearly as what it is and for what it is (God forbid we mistake that blur as a deer when it is a man) we are far better off foregoing the shot than taking it. “Oh, but I cannot afford another empty game bag for myself and family”. But how often we may learn? discover? be informed? that there is something far worse than not getting what one wants, but in the getting of something totally unwanted.

As in “Truly officer, but I thought it was a deer moving in those bushes”.

To aspire is stirred, to be inspired is divinely given, but to mistake ourselves for the only one who has done that “all” and alone is worthy to be called, or even call Himself anything, well, the seeing has a way of eclipsing all that otherwise might be found disappointing. Go ahead, take a shot at being humble, try to be an unworthy servant, seek to be all and anything you think “good”.

God forbid you find any dissuasion here.

Trying (as need be) has its end, striving has its purpose fulfilled, asking, seeking, knocking, does not go unnoticed nor unanswered. But when the door opens (or rather is shown has having been opened) to us and for us, we will not mistake the One seen as merely some better version of our own self.

But, you know this already.

If only there were some place to occupy, some word, some thing, that might fittingly fit what knows itself to be less than unworthy.

Oh!, Look, grace provides it!

A vision of Him!

Who never “tried” to be anything.

Yes, let us all boast in that light alone…even as such that might aspire to even be (O! my! such a high calling indeed!)…unworthy.

More dead horses to follow, God willing.

As only God knows.

Were we continue in this matter of light’s power, that is as such that both makes manifest and by such power of exposing reveals its utter superiority and power over darkness for its removal and/or expulsion, we might begin to appreciate its wonderful effects in, and upon, the soul. Even the soul found in earth, or earthen vessel(s). How much might be said of this! And God knows of all the how much He already has…said of this. Indeed there is no cause to add (God forbid!) but only cause of attention.

Behold is such a persuasive instruction and command. It is a command to see, and by seeing come to know a certain matter in such a way that only seeing can accomplish. Seeing brings understanding or proof(s) of matters in a way that mere words, or at very least our own mere words fall short of. “A picture” it is often said, “is worth a thousand words”. Yet there is a corollary to this, as bound to it we may find, as warmth and light may not be divided. Even heat…and light. Yes, a picture may be worth a thousand words to the common understanding of “a picture obviates the need for words”…but, just how many words has consideration of La Gioconda inspired?

Words and pictures, pictures and words. Were we to refer back to the matters of our consciousness and its nature, we would find them both at hand in usage. Sometimes we think in words, or words come to us often, and no less, images…pictures of things. Our brother on Patmos saw many images (and, not denying was also told many things), that he sought to put down in words of his beholding(s), and the words have power (by God’s inspiration) to bring us into them, that we too might “get the picture”.

And, of course, Jesus often painted with word(s). We see a picture of a father rushing to receive a prodigal son. (In mine the Father comes rushing from the left to greet a son coming from the right side of the frame as on a road. Why? I don’t know. Is it preference of some sort? Yours? How does yours look?) Suppose we are told to look closer…(dare any tell another?) is the Father laughing or weeping? The son? What is on his face? How close dare we, or are we allowed…to look and behold? Just how far is that “great way off” in your picture that the Father sees the son? How far does an old man run? Words and pictures, pictures and words. Both inspire.

These words are to help us get the picture, are they not? They even start with a “behold” as in “look and see”; and even though it seems heard far more frequently quoted to the last few words (at least in my experience) we might not get, or deliver the whole of the picture as even demonstrated by some proclivity to only recite the last few (words). Simply put: by our very own selectivity, it only shows we are not getting the full picture.

Again, we might ask “why?” Is it only a preference? Do we believe, have we believed(?) they are the “nub” of the matter and so distill them down, or conversely, up to, their true and salient meaning? To such measure as they can be singled out as capturing all that is necessary to paint the full picture? That these few are the truly important words in the “behold”?

Really, I think not.

Behold, all souls are mine; as the soul of the father, so also the soul of the son is mine: the soul that sinneth, it shall die.

What do you think?

Oh yes, dying is a very important matter…to us. If again we were to again consider our own consciousness and its oft workings to certain ends…even in avoidance of certain others, we easily see how much is devoted to the consciousness’ will to survive, to stay alive as it were at most any cost. To not perish to itself. Or, do you not know this? How that death markers are set to certain areas as in “don’t go that way”…NOT GOOD!…death is there…and thence move us to “other” roads? O! but you must know this already, right?

Only here can this be understood: There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death.

All those roads (which are always one and the same) are devoted to…death. And all spring from what “man” thinks is right in his own eyes.

Even though our roads may appear so different as we perceive each other, is not the working the same? We can laugh at the fellow who says “hold my beer and watch this” and (to us) enters into some calamity in reaching for a something (that to him looks better than some death perceived and to be avoided), yes, we do. That poor schlub! Thought he was going to impress, and now look at him, and the bone protruding from his leg. Is he to be pitied? Laughed at?

Oh, but we find out so perfectly personally when we discover the same working in us…what is asked for…and what is sought; and likewise hoped to be avoided when it is our own attempts on display. Laughter is not “funny” then. Why? Because someone uninjured laughing at our own calamity…spells death! And if it be friends? How much more does that speak…of death?

So we seek according to these road markers. Yes…and death in whatever form, at whatever juncture it places a marker “down a road” is so potent to us, even if along the road we find we must change course (the man above may find out “I don’t have real friends, at all, I must choose better company” if, or when laughed at by the uninjured we once sought to impress…”those guys are deadly”) and so death becomes our teacher. Its taste is made so very real to us. It’s odor fills nostrils and minds. Small wonder then how much emphasis is placed upon “the soul that sins, it shall die”! Yes, death (and its avoidance) is extremely important to us.

Men caution each other with it, about it, and from it…and against it. And public executions, once common, surely attest to this. Watch out! Consider what road you heed to take and from “where” you then act! For if wrong enough you will be made a spectacle by your wrong choosing! Folks will even flock to watch you held out to dangle! Loving a good show of death…as long as it is not themselves. Any (or every?) man prepared to be a cautionary tale to another, or others. And it kind of “works”, doesn’t it? It seems to have some effect…but if, and only if the presumption is made that one is dealing with, or among, a company of the already living. Those in position with something to lose, or that can be lost, to death. Or at very least, death as is understood of men.

What is this thing feared to be lost to us, taken from us in whatever form it is? At least by this specter of death man assumes he sees rightly? Precisely because he presumes himself alive. Is it not a soul being (apparently) snuffed out? We may say “person”…self, loved one, dear one, friend…wherever fear of death we may assign ourselves as holding sway. (Did you feel grieved at all this morning by the thousands on the other side of this world who didn’t “make it through” while you slept?) How much smaller is the world that is ours, than the one that is? Yet we each think we know “something of the world”, rarely conceding our own self-centric view of all.

Hey! Does ignorance…smell like death to you? Poverty? Ignominy?

We could turn it of course, if need be…what smells like life? Intelligence? Adequate provision? Some acclaim? Understanding? Wisdom? Some notion of success as each might perceive it? For the rat catcher it might be 50 caught in a day, for the mogul another million found added to the ledger in black. Yes, such ends may look very different from one another to the casual observer…but isn’t the operation in all, the same? “Getting more” and/or not losing what is necessary.

And of course the ultimate reduction in all is, “Are we running from a something or to a something?” Seeking something…or merely fleeing another something? Is it that we “love” togetherness or just hate feeling alone? Oh yeah, isolation is another biggie. What we seek, how we seek, or embrace and what we seek to escape, avoid, refuse to ourselves (or loved ones) as operation of the soul is common in all.

Do I go too far afield? Should these things be beyond consideration? How close dare we “look” to get the picture? Are we allowed? Forbidden? Just be content with fuzzy outlines, gauzy and ethereal perceptions if perchance something will be filled in later? I’d be a fool to argue against contentment. But…is one man’s contentment always the same as another’s? Should we feel, if we feel, a burr under the saddle (or a pea through a hundred mattresses) pretend we do not…and so find even in this consideration the notion of “contentment” is not as plain as it might seem. Is it resignation? Or is it something else entirely like…”be content to be spurred on”? Be content to ever pursue? Or better, “be content to be ever provoked to pursue”?

Are we not, at least while in these tabernacles of clay, still moving? Discovering motion? Even if it seems we are stopped (so to speak) at what we may call some ultimate experience as we might describe of being touched of God through Christ, who hasn’t found some “go” in it? Could it be that is the only real “go” there is? All else has been illusory, even notions of prior progress…of ourselves and even all of mankind? The only true…motivating?

Behold, all souls are mine; as the soul of the father, so also the soul of the son is mine: the soul that sinneth, it shall die.

What do we see when we see this? This “thing” commanding look and see in “Behold”? Do we see only (and repeat so often)

the soul that sinneth, it shall die.(?)

I suppose we might if we do…for I sense no need to further belabor again how big and scary death is made to us in our sight. How it captures attention, provokes, moves us by what we perceive as its imperiling of life “911, what is your emergency?”

But what of life? Is there life at all in it? Can this be mined to find life? Dug into for life’s discovery? Who do we call?

Are we as convinced as we might think or claim to be of this matter?

It is the spirit that quickeneth; the flesh profiteth nothing: the words that I speak unto you, they are spirit, and they are life.

they are spirit, and they are life.

Who is giving command/instruction to “Behold”?

And what is commanded to be beheld?

Is it really “the soul that sinneth, it shall die” or something other, or at least something very much together with it that is also to be understood?

Have we forgotten this, even as we read this:

And you, being dead in your sins and the uncircumcision of your flesh, hath he quickened together with him, having forgiven you all trespasses;

Something is always being spoken of to see by a someone who already sees and knows all things.

It either mistakenly (or even faithlessly) believes it is, or could be, in peril of losing something…even a something it fears losing that is not its own…but believes it to be, for in it and through come all and every experience that convinces a man “he is himself”.

Behold, all souls are mine; as the soul of the father, so also the soul of the son is mine:

Only in this light can this be understood:

And if ye have not been faithful in that which is another man’s, who shall give you that which is your own?

We are all and only handling any matter or all matters given to us.

As the apostle noted:

For who maketh thee to differ from another? and what hast thou that thou didst not receive? now if thou didst receive it, why dost thou glory, as if thou hadst not received it?

Was our brother John (the baptizer), of whom Jesus said “of woman born none had arisen greater” speaking by the spirit when saying this?

“A man can receive nothing except it be given him from above”

Were I to say I have come to see, or know something of self glorying; is foolish among the wise. For they would rightly say “With the amount you show you’d think you have a much better understanding of it”. And one is wise to both see that and say that. And correct.

I do not know as I ought.

Nevertheless, by the grace of God I am what I am.

I used to think/believe that was a very advanced understanding, a thing reserved only to some saying by one so very very “spiritual” and so very deeply informed. When it is merely the confession of any man who discovers he is just a man like any other, given to be who, and what he is. He, in that sense, is really just at the beginning.

It is inescapable once one sees grace shown to such, mercy poured out for such. For common man.

Even a/the chiefest of sinners. No wonder it’s written as a faithful saying and worthy of all acceptation.

For while we think ourselves better what we show is only the all that makes mercy necessary to us.

Yes, faithful are the wounds of friend. (Ministered? or Beheld?) Both?

Uh oh, Lord, now look at what I have done!

Is LOL inappropriate?

As though “LOL, I know, trust me, I felt it first before you even did it”

Are you surprised at your weakness? Stunned? Taken aback? He is not.

A friend who will laugh with us, and not at us, precisely because He is not uninjured. In being found in fashion as a man.

And neither ashamed.

Though all were heaped toward Him.

Let us go forth therefore unto him without the camp, bearing his reproach.

It’s where all is happening. It’s the only “where” where anything is happening, that is happening.

Holding the conviction that Jesus Christ is true to, and in all things, especially His word(s) is something we need help with. And it is not as though God is unknowing of this. No, (or Yes!) God knows (far better than we) the weakness of our frame. Were we to foolishly think (and there has been no greater fool I have known than myself) or entertain some notion that would, in any way, lead to some state of mind where this matter is denied, or this other matter brought to fore that would take some (or any) shape of “But Lord you don’t know what I am going through…this is unbearable!” then sure rebuke is at hand. Ahhh, rebuke!

How much am I like you? How little am I like you? You could be right if saying “This is of no matter, the question of you or I is here immaterial, the only thing that matters in all is who the Lord is” Did you think that? Would you say that? Bless you for the rebuke!

Then…who is the Lord? How is the Lord?

O! But God forbid I speak as anything but a fool. As anything more than what has been subject to all rebuke, correction, been made to see how misguided I am of myself, how many wrong turns are made possible to a man, just how much wrongness in all might be in one man, and yet find mercy. Yes, may God forbid my lying, and God help.

No (or Yes!)…I do not need some help…God help me! I need all help. Now the question might be seen in a slightly softer light “How much am I like you?” Do we need a common helper? Not common as in the commonness of dust, but common as in shared in, or with. Jesus obviously knew/knows the need, even telling the disciples to tarry in Jerusalem…until. And this instruction is given after the resurrection, after sight, after touch, after shared meals and shore lunches, passing into locked rooms (what we might call irrefutable proofs to them) of His being alive. How pumped up…even to “disbelief for joy” they were. They had proof! They saw, they knew…as much as senses could inform. Yet…tarry…

A little like a race horse just waiting for the starting gate to pop open, so ready, so ready…just pop that gate and it’s off.

No, wait. There’s something you don’t even know you need beyond all your own readiness. Oh, but you might say “The Holy Spirit is already given, the Holy Spirit is already fully abroad in all the earth, the fullness is so shed in such glorious abundance through Christ’s name that all tarrying is done, over, fulfilled…and even not needed” Yes, thank you for the correction. Yes.

No but to it, only an and. And Paul asked,”Have you received the Holy Spirit since you believed?”
Of course they didn’t know, but might it be God in His wisdom had them waiting for Paul, for a man they did not yet know, to speak to them about another matter of which they did not know, even to the end they might receive? A believer might, could…perhaps even would come to a place not dissimilar to Philip’s.

Jesus saith unto him, Have I been so long time with you, and yet hast thou not known me, Philip?

To come to find we know nothing as we ought, heard words from a someone we don’t yet fully know or understand (especially in those words) is something of a rebuke to us. But, whom does the Lord rebuke and chasten?

As many as I love I rebuke and chasten, be zealous therefore and repent.

Do we yet see how and thus rebuke is then made precious to us? Even by those words? What would we exchange to not know of His love? Would we prefer to be, or even see ourselves as those not in much need of rebuke and chastening? As those who haven’t needed it much, because well…”I’ve pretty much gotten it right all along”? I can only testify as one who both needs all the help there is, and no less, needs all the rebuke and chastening necessary. Oh, yes, we have entered a very different form of life! One that is life indeed. And if I may, may I go further? It is that very Spirit of whose help I am in all of need of, that I come to see…provides the bearing up under all this necessary rebuke. I have little doubt I would but fade away otherwise under such a heavy hand, return in all to fully acting the poser, completely given over to self deception and knowing only the death due a fraud, and without any hope. And the worse part there could be, I might still believe myself very alive to, and in Christ!

Yes, and no here. The one whose hand by which such rebuke is ministered (yes, it is a ministry of Christ) neither ask for nor needs our permission to do so, anymore than He would ask or need our permission regarding His Lordship. He sets His love where He wills. And the matter of our liking it (or not) is also a matter of no consequence. It is an odd thing yet perhaps to us (ought it to be?) that the way of learning of what and whom is of consequence comes with a continual getting out of the way, or removal, of what is of no consequence. Even as Paul said of those things lost for the sake of Christ, once of advantage to him, but now shown mere refuse, garbage, dung.

And even if, as someone I have known all too well, who cannot stand being told or shown he is wrong (or not yet right), full of errors and weaknesses about which he knew nothing (yet thinking he knew much) and as such would go about thinking he is God’s gift to the world, were to have all necessary rebuke for such a way of being, thinking, treasuring of himself…he can only testify…God is able. He is the God who both kills…and makes alive. And none can deliver from His hand. Ahhh, rebuke! What would any exchange (even if they could) to know that hand is upon them?

And I looked, and there was none to help; and I wondered that there was none to uphold: therefore mine own arm brought salvation unto me; and my fury, it upheld me.

This strange work and working is not lost on us. How that something is killing yet making alive at the same time, even in a perfect way to a perfect end is indeed different than anything we have known previously. Encouraging in rebuke. The making of a thing (as man) able to bear His heavy hand, to endure through even some taste of His displeasure, so that one might know all the pleasure God our Father Himself finds in Jesus Christ, the Son of His love. Yes, the apostle understood enough to ask a right question “Who is equal to such a task?”

He had come to see how much was “out of his own hands”. He couldn’t help, nor would he, of knowing himself to be a stench of death to some that he might be a fragrance of life to some other(s).

He hadn’t set out to this, he hadn’t planned it, he hadn’t even pursued any knowing of it, it all came as consequence to a pursuit inspired in him, a gift from another to him, a matter of not his own choosing to be anything of it. He needn’t try to be an offense anymore than any of his trying could make him acceptable before God.

And do you doubt he knew something of trying? This once Pharisee of Pharisees.

Oh, yes. He knew something of trying. And no less, of being tried. Of being in a hand that winnowed out from him all he once thought precious and of some standing. Took them, stole them, removed them by the showing of an incomparable light seen only in one other. A light in which he stood, yet also a light he knew was to be fully known at all and any cost to himself.

This is all he ever recommended. Even to such end that he would say, in all his knowing, in all his abundance of revelation, experiences, travails, labors, sorrows, comforts, sufferings, and even triumphs…”that I may know Him”.

He knew something. Even a something that caused a willing unknowing, or so pressed to it unlike anything other. A thing to be abandoned, a thing despicable in this all consuming light, a thing so common that it was uncommonly recognized of him, and spoken of, even that we might not be ignorant.

Even a thing, that in pursuit of losing to such extent as this light, the very person of Jesus Christ, provoked to; he came to loathe the notion he be found with it. Yet holding it. Yet seen embracing it. Yet be found in communing with it.

He speaks well to all who might hear for the knowing of whom Paul is. (And here I despise no other apostle nor disciple nor hold them in less repute from what might be called least to greatest)

Yet, it was given to Paul to write of this thing he longed to not be found with

And be found in him, not having mine own righteousness, which is of the law, but that which is through the faith of Christ, the righteousness which is of God by faith:

not having mine own righteousness, which is of the law,

not having mine own righteousness.

The only way to lose it, to be made separate to it, to even know of its depth of hold, or know it at all in any measure is in the light of Christ.

He alone can show it for what it is, even as He shows whom He is.

I didn’t set out to know how self righteous a man can be. I would have fainted but for one given to be all the help there is, to what needs all the help there is when it is shown. To even help a man stand under such an horrific sight of where it is being seen.

Light works. He works.

He does all things well.